


Cluck-Cluck

by JQ (musicmillennia)



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Cuddling & Snuggling, Established Relationship, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Insomnia, Leonard Snart Cooks, Mother Hen Leonard Snart, Multi, Nightmares, Protective Barry Allen, Protective Iris West, Protective Leonard Snart, Sickfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-24
Updated: 2017-04-24
Packaged: 2018-10-23 09:12:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10716471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musicmillennia/pseuds/JQ
Summary: 5 times it's proven that nobody can mother hen like Leonard Snart, and 1 time Barry and Iris disagree.





	Cluck-Cluck

**Author's Note:**

> lmao what are titles

**5\. Mondays**

"Got your coffee?"

"Check."

"Toast?"

Iris smiles. "Len."

"Well?"

" _Yes_ , I have my toast."

"Wallet?"

"I  _did_ put it in my purse, but should I be asking you that?"

She catches her wallet and puts it back.

"Phone?"

"Len, I'm not ten years old. But yes, of course I have my phone. And my laptop, which is in my case, which I also have."

She leaves the apartment.

Two seconds later, she sheepishly walks back in.

Without looking up from his book, Len points to the counter.

Iris grabs her keys and kisses his cheek.

 

**4\. "It's 10 o'clock. Do you know where your kids are?"**

The archway to the Flash suit is encased in ice.

"Dude!" Cisco whines, "That better not damage it!"

Barry sighs. "Len, come on."

Len hefts his gun on his shoulder and smirks. "One all-nighter's bad enough. Two's pushin' it, and three ain't happening. Now you either get your ass in the car, or..." he tilts his head, smirk fading. "We're gonna have a problem,  _Flash_."

"What about Iris? She's been working late all week!"

"Already home, guzzling cocoa like tomorrow's a dream. Unlike you, she can see when it's time to slow down. Quit stalling, Barry."

"You're just gonna rob a bank while I'm sleeping," Barry mumbles.

Len turns towards the door. "Only one way to find out."

(He hits up a convenience store instead. "Nothin' high class. My nemesis was out cold.")

 

**3\. A Rainy Day**

Barry's fallen asleep on his notes. He's woken up by repeated smacks to his cheek.

"Whaddyah want, Snart?" he groans.

"Up and at 'em, kid," Len says, "you're gonna get a sore neck."

"'m fine."

"Uh-huh." Len hauls him from his chair and shoves him at the couch. "Stay down."

Barry grumbles some insults. Len puts a blanket on him.

A few minutes later, Iris is herded next to him.

"My desk is comfy," she gripes.

"That's because you're both workaholics," Len says.

"Pot, kettle."

" _I_ don't sleep on my notes. They'd get ruined."

"Bet you used to," Barry says petulantly.

Len rolls his eyes and heads to the kitchen. "Either one of you gets up, it better be for good reason." Thunder rolls ominously with his words.

Iris growls something. Barry's already back to sleep.

 

**2\. Time Out**

Len charges into STAR Labs, eyes glowing, gun raised.

"Stop right there," he snaps, voice echoing with the Oculus' power.

Team Flash freezes.

Barry's hand hovers over his suit.

Mick crosses his arms. He looks terribly amused. "Snart here happened to look at your timelines. Practically hijacked the ship."

Len gestures with his gun. "Back up.  _Now_."

Barry sheepishly obeys. His red nose sniffles. Pneumonia, for him, has all the power of a common cold, but it's still a bitch. And apparently Leonard Snart sensed his illness across time and space.

Iris hacks a wet cough.

(Hers too.)

Caitlin huffs. "Take them home, would you?"

Len responds by glaring holes in Iris and Barry's head. Iris glares back, but Barry bows his head and shuffles over. Len shoves his parka, taken off before he disembarked the ship, into Barry's hands. Barry pulls it on, sighing a little at how warm it is.

"Got a hot-wired car outside," Mick says.

"Why am I not surprised?" Iris replies flatly.

"I suggest you get in it," Len says.

Iris crosses her arms, glassy eyes narrowing. "Or what? You'll pistol-whip me?"

Mick snorts. "Don't tempt 'im."

"Girl," Cisco says, "take a day. Please."

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but go with the criminals," Caitlin says.

Iris clenches her teeth. "We still have to―"

"Iris," Wally says, "it's either this, or I'm calling Dad."

Len takes advantage of her distraction and snatches her wrist. Before she can think to get out of it, reality bends and she's standing outside of STAR Labs.

Barry blinks the dots from his eyes and gets into the car in another fit of wet coughs.

Iris yanks herself from Len's grip. "I'm fine."

Len opens the door for her.

She scowls and goes.

 

Len's hidden every laptop and tablet in their apartment. Iris would go and investigate, but Len's too busy putting soup in her lap and opening Netflix.

Barry's put his head on her shoulder, lightly dozing while Caitlin's specially made pills take effect. He perks up at the smell of Len's soup―mother's recipe, apparently, and a favorite of Lisa's.

Len's put tea and water on their trays as well, with aspirin for Iris. "Eat," he orders.

Iris takes the pills. "I have an article to write, you know. At least let me finish that."

"You wanna do a job right, you take care of yourself first."

"That's rich coming from you."

"I'm a criminal. I'm allowed to be a hypocrite."

"But you're a hero too," Barry says.

Len grabs his hair and tilts his head down. "Eat your soup."

Iris sniffles. "You booby-trapped the apartment, didn't you."

"I like to be prepared."

"I'll find my way out of it."

Len smirks. "I'd like to see you try."

 

When Iris falls asleep on Barry, Len tucks her in.

 

**1\. The Sponge**

Barry gurgles.

Iris' jaw works open and closed like a fish.

Len finishes scrubbing the last plate, rinsing and drying with easy efficiency. The rest of their apartment is just as impeccable, possibly in better condition than on the day they took the lease. Every blanket's folded, every pillow meticulously fluffed and placed, every dish and counter top glistening―even the windows are washed.

Len sticks his little blue miracle of a sponge in a ceramic snowman holder and turns to lean against the counter, as if he's still trying to look like a scheming villain.

"What's the matter?" he says, "Ice got your tongue?"

"Clean," Barry croaks.

Len glances around. "Good to know you recognize it when you see it. I'm gone for two weeks your time and suddenly you've run a whirlwind around here."

Iris runs over and kisses him full on the mouth.

 

**+1. Cotton Ball**

When Len shuts the door behind him, he lets out a long breath.

Iris and Barry had closed the blinds. The kettle's on, with an Elsa mug next to it. And at the stove, Barry's cooking mac n' cheese. Only thing he doesn't burn.

Barry sets his spoon aside and hurries to him. "What happened?"

Len shrugs a shoulder. "Got painkillers. You should see the other guy."

"Why didn't you let Gideon fix you up?"

"It looks worse than it is," Len says. "That hot cocoa you're boilin'?"

A startled hiss gets their attention. Iris' scrunched face greets them from the bedroom doorway.

"Sit down," she says, "I'll get the first aid."

"I'm―"

"Len, don't you dare."

Len's bruised lip quirks. He sits at the counter, making his movements seem deliberately slow instead of pained. Iris and Barry don't buy it. Know him too well. Len's stuck with them too long.

Barry stirs the mac n' cheese a little more before turning back to Len. "So? What happened?"

"Cult in the thirteenth century," Len says. "Apparently some of their magic wasn't  _all_ a sham. I'm one 'a the lucky ones."

Iris comes back and asks, "How's the rest of the team?"

Len braces himself for that bitchy cotton ball. "They're just―"  _fuck_ , "peachy."

Barry takes the other pot from the stove. Sweet cocoa, an old West family recipe, fills the apartment. Len still thinks his cocoa's better, but maybe Lisa's biased.

Iris keeps dabbing the cotton ball on his cheek. "How about you have a bath after dinner? A nice soak will be good for you."

Damn, that sounds perfect.

Len side-eyes the mac n' cheese as Barry loads up the cocoa with mini-marshmallows. "So long as we at least have  _some_ greens with that."

Iris presses a gentle kiss to his forehead. "Deal."

 


End file.
